mattwarden.com — anonymous quotes

Below is simply a random listing of out-of-context quotes. To protect the innocent, these are all anonymous (except when quoting copyrighted or otherwise publicly-attributed material).

"Perl may look like a cartoon character swearing, but there are cases where it surpasses Python conceptually." - Paul Graham, The Python Paradox

"At present, it is generally not possible to do anything useful in a perl script."

"I love the net, it always makes me come off as a better person than I really am."

"If you are installing on Microsoft Windows or another oddball operating system, please consult the appropriate sections in this installation guide for notes on how to be successful." (from the Bugzilla installation document)

"[disclaimer: current body uptime: 29.5 hours]"

"our extensive research has shown that failure in relationships is directly proportional to the number of Alt codes one has memorized"

"The problem with America is stupidity. I'm not saying there should be a capital punishment for stupidity, but why don't we just take the safety labels off of everything and let the problem solve itself?"

"i was gonna call 911...but i was downloading a file"

"You know what's wrong with this channel, Nathan buys laptops and scotch, and you people ask him what kind of laptops."

"Good news, Tweet, you have a girlfriend. Bad news, she's thinks you're gay."

"I spent a minute looking at my own code by accident. I was thinking 'What the hell is this guy doing?'"

"msmin can kiss my [...] ass. outlook express is a little fucking drama queen. 'OOoOHHHH, YOU UPGRADED TO IE 6. WELL IM NOT GONNA WORK ANYMORE'"

"I went on a 30-day diet, and lost 30 days"

"WinME is a app you put on someone elses computer to play a joke on them into thinkin their computer is fucked"

"I believe in sex and death -- two experiences that come once in a lifetime"

"How can you think you matter when your URL has a tilde in it?"

"i just wanna go to court and be on the plantiff side for once"

"I'm still looking for a girl that can get aroused by the sound of a hard drive spinning down"

"tetris is so unrealistic"

"i just asked a girl out. been 6 minutes no reply. maybe icq wasn't the way to go"

"All women are gay, or at least that's what they tell me"

"I DEAL WITH THE GODDAMN CUSTOMERS. I HAVE PEOPLE SKILLS. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU."

"You can tell me if you're gay you know, i'm drunk now, i can take it"

"moo spelled backwards is moo" "no wait..."

"leave the advanced tab alone - if you were advanced you'd know how to use it"

"yeah, if you live in a cheap state."

"Might as well consider dedicated hosting too. Or, we could rent out our own office space, run a couple T1s to it, and have our own little hosting company just for evolt.org."

"get real. Learn how to do a tendering process."

"we are now fully one month past dan's departure, and what do we have? discussion about how long to keep open a voting process to nominate leaders for the groups"

"It won't matter *what* goes in the marketing half of the document if this pile of crap goes with it."

"why don't you just take over and be the leader? you seem to be itching for it, you're qualified, and it would give you the opportunity to show everybody how things should be done the right way, rather than pointing out when they fall short of best practices"

"ya, driving on a wisconsin road after a packer game is like russian roulette"

"Great if you can make a website that works in NS 1.0 and for a 84 year old user from the Ozarks who views the web through a mercury filling in his molar"

"sure, it can scale up if need be, but it needs to suck ass first"

"how can I still make an impact with the truth?"

"if we start applying colors or emphasis to *everything* (like <q>, <code>, etc.), our pages will read like a crayola box"

"i should just make web sites, then i can make lots of money and not have to work too hard."

"If you're using Cold Fusion 4, they've finally put in a switch statement into it"

"If I've told you once, I've told you a million times: don't exaggerate!"

"http://rudy.ca/ - where you will now get a cookie, just for the hell of it"

"this site best viewed if you come over to my office and look at it on my state-of-the-art graphics terminal"

"The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you." -Rita Mae Brown

"The FOREIGN KEY, CHECK, and REFERENCES clauses don't actually do anything." (from the MySQL documentation)

"It's about taking baby steps. It's about developing relationship. It's kind of like making a painting, or making music, or making love."

"Using Navigator? Or a modem? Are you in a school or a library? We don't want your business. Go hunt rats for food. Damn cavemen."

"Then call me Captain Illogical, I guess."

"This comment is idiotic: `MySQL has carved out a very interesting niche: raw speed and simple to setup/use/maintain database backend for online applications.' I'll tell you what, if I was able to strip out 30% of the functionality of enterprise-level [relational database management systems], they would be pretty damned fast too."

"I have seen data shaping and it is the spawn of satan"

"Three dimensions. The defence rests, your honour."